After 14 years of matchmaking in Ukraine, coaching men on how to set themselves free from the virtual dating online, I'm today able to provide clear facts about this global phenomenon. The whole truth about a past-time that has become part of the lives of single people everywhere there's a Wi-Fi connection, nowadays more accessible than a glass of water when extremely thirsty.
1. Chances of meeting your soulmate while dating online
Mathematical estimates, supposing your significant other fated at your birth, is approximately within your age group, and the mutual feelings are noticeable at the first glimpse, indicates that your chances to meet your soulmate are 1 in 10,000 (0.010 percent). Love brokers as matchmakers (first mentioned in the Book of Genesis 950 before Common Era as Biblical matchmaking) or the internet dating services, as Kiss.com, the first modern dating website in 1994, followed by match.com in 1995, gained legitimacy with the release of You've Got Mail (1998) movie with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. By 1996, there were 16 online dating sites listed on Yahoo's directory.
The Matchmaking Institute estimates that there are now more than 2,000 professional matchmakers and above 2,500 dating sites in the U.S. alone. Considering that Zoosk as an example among those 2,500 sites, exchanges over 3 million messages a day, and others as Match that has over fifteen million paid members, shouldn't the marriage success rate be up to the roof?
In the U.S. alone, the target demographic for these services is 90 million singles between 19 and 45 years of age. 62% of online daters are already in a relationship (51%) or married (11%). If considering international dating as an added option, and due to the vast offer of available foreign women, the odds of meeting a soulmate should be much more optimistic. Still, the chances of succeeding dating abroad with online services and marry a foreign woman are below 5%. Why does that happen?
2. Online dating still has a social stigma and stereotypes
It doesn't matter how far we have reached digitally. There is always something unromantic and disappointingly nontraditional about online dating. Two out of every five single people aged 24 – 50 currently use, or have used an online dating service representing 40% of the single population! Now think of all the bachelor friends you have; how many of them have told you that they've signed up to a site to kick start their love lives? Not many, I would guess. That's because, in spite of its popularity, there's still a social stigma about dating sites; 23% of people think those who use online dating are desperate, so they generally pretend to their families and friends that they've met in a bar or at some party or work-related function.
The findings show that, although people are definitely more compliant to search for love online, there is quite a bit more dishonor associated stigma when dating Eastern European women. Stereotypes, as specific international public opinion viciously labeled them as; they will do anything to emigrate, they are cold and emotionless, can’t function without a man, all are blonde, skinny, and obsessed with looks but once hit the 50s, turn into babushkas (grandmas). They wear a clownish amount of makeup, suffer for fashion, never work, and become gold-diggers. Such prejudice only can be sustained by uncultured or suspicious behavior in an attempt to narrow down men's freedom of option.
3. What are the chances of online dating succeeding?
Only about 5% of people who join dating sites end up in a relationship with someone they first met online. Let's equate this to the real world; you walk into a room full of one hundred strangers, and how many of them would you be attracted? Probably no more than ten, and that's if you're lucky. But in cyberspace, things drastically reverts — how many total strangers will there be on any site that presses all your right buttons? Hundreds!!! So when you register with an international dating site, don't expect your love life to be different from the reality just because you receive all those lovely messages from women often much younger than you. Keep in mind that you're crossing an ocean swimming all by yourself and only have a 5% chance to reach the other shore successfully; will you be that lucky?
4. What should you look at when searching for a wife overseas?
Popular international dating sites are famous for one reason and one reason only. They have plenty of exuberant fish. On the internet, you'll find a handful of sites that outstrip others in terms of volume of their profiles and reputation in general, but none of these sites are free. Global sites which can parade hundreds of thousands of members from all four corners of the globe are a waste of time unless you're looking for a pen-pal. These sites might sound rather impressive — “We have 5,000,000 members worldwide!!” — But so what? What you should be concerned with when choosing a website is how many members they have in your city, your town, or the country you have in mind to search for a partner for life. If you're serious about finding a local partner, stick to a city or country-specific sites and disregard the 'global' sales pitch. Quantity does not necessarily imply quality, and a massive offer often brings misleading strategy and lesser focus on how best to target your goals. Do not pay for what you do not need!
On the other hand, if you're finding a wife abroad, bear in mind that women, regardless of their nationality, have prevalent vicissitudes. There are no more shortcuts when finding a wife overseas: mail-order bride is an archaic term from the twentieth century utterly obsolete in its practicality nowadays. Particularly in the countries of the former Soviet Union, due to cultural differences, history, family traditions, and many other factors, women behave differently. You may already know that Slavonic women are special and not like anybody else. But you may not know how to overcome intercultural differences and how exactly the lack of innate knowledge can influence your achievements dating Slavic women overseas. Such essential understanding only an international dating expert residing in the country can provide— someone who advantageously guides your steps and bridge obstacles optimizing your performance to succeed.
5. Are you receiving a reliable reciprocation dating online?
Almost two-thirds who use online dating say the number one thing they're looking for in a date or partner is common interests, while less than half say physical characteristics are the most important to them. Still, between you and me, I believe at least half of them lie. For example, on a local dating site, 20% of women will use photos from when they were younger, while 40% of men will lie about their jobs. But on the other hand, on international dating sites where men pay per-letter, will be the men to use more out-of-date profile photos and lie about their age and still receive each day tens of dazzling messages from younger women igniting their most hidden-dreams and fantasies.
Bear in mind that on 95% of the cases, you’re reciprocated just because you are paying to send/receive those letters. Swimming hazardous waters with charming mermaids chasing your money; it does not even matter if your profile has no photo, matters you purchase those credits, and keep chatting.
Beauty is satisfaction, and many men can easily drown in unrealistic waters attracted by the image of supposedly gorgeous marriage-oriented Slavic women dating online. If you hammered your finger, don't blame the hammer: those sites' propaganda only aims your expectations proposing virtual satisfaction at a cost. Pay-per-letter dating sites' primary purpose is your wallet and not helping you get married soon; in truth, if it would be that easy, users would fast succeed and not stay years surfing profiles online.
6. Which are the chances I’m talking to the real person online?
While numerous dating sites lean slightly more female with their gender ratio (e.g., Match 51% vs. 49%), online dating tends to attract more males (52.4%) compared to females (47.6%) so as far as the online arena is concerned, it's the girls who are calling the shots. Another alternative is the international dating sites where attractive young foreign women overwhelmingly overrate men. You'll be surprised with their “manifested interest on you,” and your expectations levels will reach the skies. But how certain you can be about their sincere interest in you, and how legit is the communication you are exchanging? That's another big question.
The chances you will be directly communicating with those women on pay-per-letter sites are below 2%. So guys, if you do not want to end falling in love with a picture and are sincerely searching for a foreigner wife, you better not dive in such waters. If you have doubts, just watch the video below about the online dating pay-per-letter process explained.
Dating sites fish you in with a supposedly reasonable offer, but in the long run, as happens with 95% of the cases, you'll find it definitely expensive and frustrating! Joining those sites is apparently cheap, and the pitch sells of finding a great relationship with the woman of your dreams makes the risk/reward ratio a no-brainer compared to, let's say, contracting a professional matchmaker. But why then, those sites have such a low success rate when compared to a tailored matchmaking service? Before diving in any of those propagandized short cuts, it is highly recommended and of good sense to evaluate which service can effectively enhance your chances to succeed in finding the one.
For example: if a specific website advertises to have helped create 240 couples in one year (480 users) and even though part of those succeeded, clients may have provided an authentic testimonial, still bear in mind that, on average, the online dating success rate is below 5%. Considering that number of succeeded cases (and this is a mere example you can scale to any dating site), it means that that particular site would have 9,600 users (100%) from which 9,200 (95%) did not successfully found the significant one. That said, by joining such a site, you know beforehand to have a 95% chance not to succeed. Is it then worthy of trying such a probability?
It is comprehensible how appealing a dating site can be exhibiting all those tempting females profiles. But how to know in truth which those women really exist and are legitimately interested in you? Remember?!... The odds of finding the intended perfect match in life was mathematically proven to be 1 in 10,000. A dating site may upgrade those probabilities to 5%. But a matchmaker has a 10x success rate proportionally if compared to any dating site. Let me explain: A matchmaker cannot physically match 20 couples in a single month (the same as to making 240 couples within 12 months). It just doesn't happen!
In the case of contracting a matchmaker, though obviously not at the same price as a dating site, your chances to succeed are 10X, which means, you have 50% chances to get what you paid for and succeed within 1-year. That said, where do you feel having higher probabilities of succeeding, and mainly, if dating overseas is your goal?
— Try the luck and be one of that 5 % that succeed online?
— Or have a 50% chance with an international matchmaker?
When dating online, you are on your own, and that's it!
If your goal is to date overseas, then your options are quite clear: how much disappointment, time, and money can cost to fail such a romantic tour overseas?
When supported by a local matchmaker, you have then a trustful ally in-country defending your interest and increasing your chances of success exponentially by doing and accessing first things your knowledge and the geographic situation does not allow you to as:
- Screen selected and proposes offline candidates
- Facilitate legit direct contact with those women
- Provide first-hand feedback and tailored advice
- Coach and guide all your steps during dating trip
- Safeguard your presence in-country and logistics
Book a Dating Consultation Call to enhance your potential success significantly and optimize your time-search avoiding financial or emotional losses.